Bill and Hillary are on a sinking boat. Who gets saved?
The nation.
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Did you hear Clinton doesn't use bookmarks?
He just bends over the pages!
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Why did Bill get into this problem?
He didn't know that harass was one word.
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Clinton Presidential Anthem-
Kneel to the Chief
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Why is there no proof?
She swallowed the evidence.
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Who's handling the case?
"Intern"al Affairs
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Prosecutor: Mr. Clinton, did you have an improper relationship with Monica Lewinsky?
Pres: Improper? ... Ain't nothing improper about that. That was one of the the sweetest interns I've ever had.
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What's the difference between Watergate and Zippergate?
At least this time, there's no doubt about the identity of "Deep Throat."
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How did Bill reply regarding questions of "coaching" Monica's testimony?
"It wasn't words that I put in her mouth".
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Why is Chelsea upset about Zippergate?
Her dad is getting more dates than she is.
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Why did Monica Lewinsky accept an offer to work on the White House staff?
She didn't understand know what STAFF he really meant.
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What is Revlon calling it's new Presidential winter line for 1998?
Shades of the truth
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Why is President Clinton waiting to tell his side of the story?
He's waiting for Marv Albert to do the interview.
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What was the White House Chief of Staff's reaction to the Lewinsky story?
Now I know why they kept calling Monica the "head" intern!
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What's Hillary's new nickname for Bill's penis?
"The Titanic" - because over 1500 interns went down on it.
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What was yesterday's Washington Post Headline?
Bush Beats Clinton
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What is Clinton's new Secret Service Code Name?
Unibanger
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How does Hillary feel?
She may be the FIRST LADY, but she won't be the LAST
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What do Bill and Ross Perot have in common?
They both heard a giant sucking sound!
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President Clinton said to Monica, "I didn't tell you to lie in deposition . . .
I told you to lie in THAT POSITION!"
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What's the actual title of Hillary's book?
"It Takes a Village . . . to Satisfy my Husband"
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Realization of from another White House intern . . .
And all that time I thought that humming was the shredder!
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How did Clinton exercise his position as Commander-in-Chief?
By barking out orders . . . like "Get Under the Desk!"
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Don't feel sorry for Monica......
She'll be back "on her knees" in no time!
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Why does Clinton think he's innocent,
Because he didn't inhale the intern!
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What's the difference between Bill Clinton and the Titanic?
Only 1,500 went down on the Titanic.
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What's the new game they're playing in the White House?
Swallow the Leader.
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What does Monica Lewinsky have on her Resume?
"Sat on the Presidential Staff"
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In a survey of American women, when asked, "Would you sleep with President Clinton",
86% replied, "Not again"
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What's the new press name for the latest Presidential scandal?
Fornigate.