The following appeared recently in
the Pet Market section of the Anderson SC Independent Mail classifieds:
2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7
wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess.
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Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
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A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing
forms.
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Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
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For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
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Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
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Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
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Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
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Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
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We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
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For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
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For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.
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Great Dames for sale.
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Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
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Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
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Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
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Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.
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If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis Cemetery. It boasts
such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and Chopin.
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Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool
while you drink it all in.
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The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic
facilities.
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Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
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Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast.
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Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear
nothing else.
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Stock up and save. Limit: one.
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We build bodies that last a lifetime.
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For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
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Man, honest. Will take anything.
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Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.
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Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
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UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
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Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.
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Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play.
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Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
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Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
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3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred.
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Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
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Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
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Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere
again.
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Holcross pullets. Starting to lay Betty Clayton, Granite 5-6204.
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Illiterate? Write today for free help.
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Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary.
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Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping
duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
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Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
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Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
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And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
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We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00.